Honoring and Submission

In today’s culture the very idea of “honoring and submitting” sends chills up a woman’s spine! LOL! However, it is NOT meant to be a bad thing. God does not look at us as less than our husbands. We have been given a VERY special role. And, if today’s Christian woman will grasp what God’s Word is telling us, we really CAN have a wonderful…happy…AND fulfilling marriage.

However, let each man of you without exception love his wife as his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly. – Ephesians 5:33

Reverence is a vital action within a marriage for a wife. We must honor and respect the husband that God gave us.

We are to prefer him above all except God, of course. We are to go to him for counsel and respect him alone, together, with friends, and/or our children & family.

We also need to SPEAK life to them and about them. We may need to speak it to ourselves as well. We must stop focusing on what they do not do and focus on the positives. YES, there are positives. You just need to look for them–especially if you have spent long periods of time dwelling on his negatives. It will require MORE effort!

She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her. – Proverbs 31:12

Ways to EDIFY our Husbands directly

(things to say TO them)

  • You are an awesome husband
  • Thank you for all that you do
  • what can I do for YOU
  • You are very handsome
  • I appreciate you
  • I love you
  • I want you
  • You are a wonderful Father

I am sure if you take the time you can add a LOT to this list. Some of you may not feel ANY of these things. You will need to SPEAK them by FAITH!

Ways to EDIFY our Husbands Indirectly

(things we say to others)

  • I have the best husband
  • I have no complaints
  • He is a great Dad
  • He did this the other day (something positive)
  • My husband is a good provider
  • I am thankful for my husband because…

Do you know what Help Meet means (Genesis 2:18)? It comes from root words; azar (aw-zar’) and ezer (ay’zer) and means; surround, protect, or aid. Cooperate with, serve, side with, go to bat for, save, snatch from danger, make healthy, balm, aid.

On the flip side, (meaning the opposite); hinder, obstruct, hold back, block, frustrate, side against, discourage, harm, hurt, injure, kill, let die, make worse.

Whether we like it or not, we have the power to make or break our husbands. We need to control our tempers, tongues, desires and flesh.

Proverbs 29:11 says; a self confident fool utters all of his anger, but a wise man holds it back and stills it

Now, the original Hebrew word for utters is ruwach (roo’ – vakh). It means a violent exhalation, anger, unsubstantiability, blast, whirlwind.

So, basically, when we lose our temper and spew out our anger it’s like what a hurricane does when it hits land. It destroys everything in its path. I have read this Scripture many times. However, when I got out my concordance to do this study, I looked into this Scripture more deeply, and now my eyes are open…

Ephesians 4:26 says; When angry, do not sin; do not ever let your wrath (your exasperation, your fury or indignation) last until the sun goes down.

This tells me that I can get angry. Anger in and of itself is not sin. However, we need to lean to express our anger without sinning (yelling, cursing, degrading, dishonoring, etc.) This will require prayer, practice, submitting to God, filling your mind with the WORD and not the world’s ideas, and never giving up!

If you want a husband who is a good spiritual leader, take it to Daddy. Then, begin to SPEAK life over him. Speak it out into the spiritual realm…OUT LOUD. Pray some more. Be willing to wait no matter how long it takes. If it never happens, at least at the end of your life when you give an account as to the words you spoke, you can stand!

This is the same for ANY of the character traits we want from our husbands. Take it to Daddy. SPEAK it out loud. Speak LIFE. Pray some more. Wait.

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  1. Thank you for this encouragement, it was very much needed. Things have gotten so ugly in my household, I find myself so stressed out (SAHM with 2 toddlers) and lonely that any time I see my husband I lash out in anger demanding help, his time, etc. This in turn causes him to want to spend less time at home or respond back by being defensive. In any case my poor kids have fallen victims to my rage more often than I want to admit. Please pray for me and my family. Thank you again for your encouraging wisdom!

  2. Thank you! I really need to hear it right now.

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